the world, the world - all its foibles and quirks
the world where want want simple things to work!
goodness if found by those who appreciate it,
who know pride & triumph to be complicated
wrapped-up yet unraveled, feeling formulaic
thinly-spread dreamers end up archaic
for all the unkempt tidings strewn to & from,
none ring as true as loving my mom
Lost Art Boy
Selected pieces from various notebooks. Creations are to be shared; ergo, blog.
success / hail - 2013-7-23
success is not a title
success is not a deed
success is not cooking
a mouth some feed
you are not sailing through courses
it is not scholarly to prevail
you're cold and freeze rain,
causing damage via hail
via hail, via hail, via hail
I will bonk my head
success is not a deed
success is not cooking
a mouth some feed
you are not sailing through courses
it is not scholarly to prevail
you're cold and freeze rain,
causing damage via hail
via hail, via hail, via hail
I will bonk my head
do, and feel - 2013-7-9
the straight take a piece
from the loose who are waiting
to be told how together they are
though they hairsis funny
n they shirtsis old
the penniless losers go far
make a name for yourself in your four white walls!
go where the air is a blanket
(all of us are warm - we've all gone inside)
do, and feel [x4]
from the loose who are waiting
to be told how together they are
though they hairsis funny
n they shirtsis old
the penniless losers go far
make a name for yourself in your four white walls!
go where the air is a blanket
(all of us are warm - we've all gone inside)
do, and feel [x4]
all selves - 2013-7-17
the artist needs a studio
the worker needs a shop
the boy needs a cheerio
the teen needs pants to drop
the elder needs pride
the bucket needs a mop
the walking need their stride
and the dying need to stop
the worker needs a shop
the boy needs a cheerio
the teen needs pants to drop
the elder needs pride
the bucket needs a mop
the walking need their stride
and the dying need to stop
beelines - 2013-7-17
everybody's making beelines
nobody wants to get stung
we are all ladder climbers
getting jaded on the rungs
and we're dosing each other poison
to stay happy like the young
before the day is done
before our days are done
you got your bills, you got your thrills
you got your got, got, got-to-get got
you got some pretties to keep you warming
'til you're hot, hot, hot, hot, hot
and all the while you look at ladders
& see failure 'til the top
and until you get up there
you're never gonna stop
one day you might get antsy
seeing a friend up on YOUR perch
you'll sting him to make him weak
like when he was birthed
but you ain't proud of your foibles,
or the plight of being a man
you're too caught up doing nothing,
and not what you can
so go ahead & sting your suitors,
smack your lovers, and snack on defeat
the pain you cause the swollen weak
remind you you're elite
but if you ever have a moment
where your head is well-aligned,
your duty is defined,
your systems are on time,
and your life is apart from mine,
maybe you'll worry less about legwork & the climb
maybe you'll stop lamenting "mine, mine, mine"
may you start loving more of the time
may you start loving more of time
and you will step off the decrepit ladder
and fly
*this is yet another piece written in a cathartic moment; to that end, I now feel barred from editing it
nobody wants to get stung
we are all ladder climbers
getting jaded on the rungs
and we're dosing each other poison
to stay happy like the young
before the day is done
before our days are done
you got your bills, you got your thrills
you got your got, got, got-to-get got
you got some pretties to keep you warming
'til you're hot, hot, hot, hot, hot
and all the while you look at ladders
& see failure 'til the top
and until you get up there
you're never gonna stop
one day you might get antsy
seeing a friend up on YOUR perch
you'll sting him to make him weak
like when he was birthed
but you ain't proud of your foibles,
or the plight of being a man
you're too caught up doing nothing,
and not what you can
so go ahead & sting your suitors,
smack your lovers, and snack on defeat
the pain you cause the swollen weak
remind you you're elite
but if you ever have a moment
where your head is well-aligned,
your duty is defined,
your systems are on time,
and your life is apart from mine,
maybe you'll worry less about legwork & the climb
maybe you'll stop lamenting "mine, mine, mine"
may you start loving more of the time
may you start loving more of time
and you will step off the decrepit ladder
and fly
*this is yet another piece written in a cathartic moment; to that end, I now feel barred from editing it
your best - late 2012
I don't have reasons to like you
(I'm not sure I have anything)
I doubt someone's tugging on me
cause I don't want to have any strings
the thoughts you do not share
because you won't afford the time
are like a glass of alcohol
getting extinguished by a lime
you got the glitter box
strewn all over me
if you come up sun shining
I won't be able to see
______________
do you think I need help?
do you think I need rest?
do you know how to feel your best?
all the lowlife people
didn't know you were as smart as you were
when you did your best
(I'm not sure I have anything)
I doubt someone's tugging on me
cause I don't want to have any strings
the thoughts you do not share
because you won't afford the time
are like a glass of alcohol
getting extinguished by a lime
you got the glitter box
strewn all over me
if you come up sun shining
I won't be able to see
______________
do you think I need help?
do you think I need rest?
do you know how to feel your best?
all the lowlife people
didn't know you were as smart as you were
when you did your best
feeling - 2013-10-15
feeling:
beyond this world, and yet - a part of it
celestial & aligned
before this world, I was apart from it
unassembled & undesigned
according to me, there's a degree of shit
constructed & defined
feeling:
throughout my time, while monitoring it
prepared & unprimed
wasted, not spent, the precious bits?
heart beats, & flatlines
beyond this world, and yet - a part of it
celestial & aligned
before this world, I was apart from it
unassembled & undesigned
according to me, there's a degree of shit
constructed & defined
feeling:
throughout my time, while monitoring it
prepared & unprimed
wasted, not spent, the precious bits?
heart beats, & flatlines
rose / undeveloped punk song - 2013-5-29
aren't you just full of hatred, anger, piss, vinegar, and disappointment?
we've all felt some ways sometimes.
we've all felt some ways sometimes!
how do you feel?
hey, are you real?
moments in the mirror
moments in a pose
do you think you are wilting?
do you think you are a rose?
we've all felt some ways sometimes.
we've all felt some ways sometimes!
how do you feel?
hey, are you real?
moments in the mirror
moments in a pose
do you think you are wilting?
do you think you are a rose?
don't care / pests & critters - 2013-6-2
don't care, don't care, don't care
it will go nowhere
______________
put yourself into your work
be alone, and be a jerk
step inside a box & rest your mind upon
ideas of being someone
shave because you never do
change, and then they'll look at you
desires on a page in black & white
make you feel lonely tonight
in a garden, sun is high
tend your garden, day & night
pests & critters may take it away
pests & critters may break your heart away
pests & critters break your heart today [x4]
_______________
there is always another day
dead at least, alive at most
if you dry up & shrivel
may you make fertile compost
it will go nowhere
______________
put yourself into your work
be alone, and be a jerk
step inside a box & rest your mind upon
ideas of being someone
shave because you never do
change, and then they'll look at you
desires on a page in black & white
make you feel lonely tonight
in a garden, sun is high
tend your garden, day & night
pests & critters may take it away
pests & critters may break your heart away
pests & critters break your heart today [x4]
_______________
there is always another day
dead at least, alive at most
if you dry up & shrivel
may you make fertile compost
refuge - 2013-5-12
refuge at home
cold & placed on the ground
placed softly & warmly
without making a sound
pulses tell you to go
pulses tell you to go
but you know you don't want to go
ain't it timid, ain't it spent?
all regret that went
is like a choice made so long ago
you forget what it meant
and deny it made a dent
________
abandon the ones you love
to undo being unknown
& you'll go somewhere -
you'll go far
though you may be who you are,
you cannot get there by car
cold & placed on the ground
placed softly & warmly
without making a sound
pulses tell you to go
pulses tell you to go
but you know you don't want to go
ain't it timid, ain't it spent?
all regret that went
is like a choice made so long ago
you forget what it meant
and deny it made a dent
________
abandon the ones you love
to undo being unknown
& you'll go somewhere -
you'll go far
though you may be who you are,
you cannot get there by car
leader - 2013-5-12
leader don't need no one
& don't you know it so?
the led wait for the leading -
they gotta go
I been without title -
my head in my hands
I been wanderlustin'
but I ain't left land
don't 'xpect me to cry
when you're torn all apart
if you dropped the ball for yourself
I love what I can,
and some of which I shant,
all to make sure I see myself
& don't you know it so?
the led wait for the leading -
they gotta go
I been without title -
my head in my hands
I been wanderlustin'
but I ain't left land
don't 'xpect me to cry
when you're torn all apart
if you dropped the ball for yourself
I love what I can,
and some of which I shant,
all to make sure I see myself
a slightly edited, sentimental catharsis - February 2012
put my misery in a box
and brought it out sea
but first I took my heart out
and kept it far from my sleeve
I put a padlock on it
but I cracked the lock off
on a burst of sadness,
or total lack of
"put it in the box,"
said the crow to the girl
the one who sits inside me
who gives my heart a thrill
this went nicely with the sea-boy
who was fit to sail
he believed in coffins
but admonished the nail
with a smile unhesitated
I embarked upon the waves
the 3 of us reckoned
untowards our graves
as the box in my hands
received an order from the cackling,
the girl & the crow who think they're happy soon,
I rusted my face sour
and kept internal my packing
which made me feel like a mischievous goon
the box, from my lusty hands,
was released from its shackling
& plummeted towards a dug-out hole in its cemetary
which in this case was just water,
5,000 miles from home -
5,000 miles of this damned ferry
and as the bitches leapt with joy
as my doom met my day,
there were so many lines
on my face that day
into the ocean
heading all ways from my past
I dove into the water
I dove so terribly fast
the box - I'll get another,
however fine a new corrugate may be
but my heart? Jesus Christ -
that belongs to me!
so despite the partial enemies
aboard your ship tonight,
don't be scared if you're wrong,
or if your parents are right
cause look at me, wet with ocean,
high on love & greed & fright -
I don't change much
from night to night
but I'm sure you got a boat
to keep you dry without a pail
just watch out for little birdies
who say they know how to sail
*although mildly reworked upon transcription, I remain too attached to the initial emotional charge upon this piece's conception to revise it further.
and brought it out sea
but first I took my heart out
and kept it far from my sleeve
I put a padlock on it
but I cracked the lock off
on a burst of sadness,
or total lack of
"put it in the box,"
said the crow to the girl
the one who sits inside me
who gives my heart a thrill
this went nicely with the sea-boy
who was fit to sail
he believed in coffins
but admonished the nail
with a smile unhesitated
I embarked upon the waves
the 3 of us reckoned
untowards our graves
as the box in my hands
received an order from the cackling,
the girl & the crow who think they're happy soon,
I rusted my face sour
and kept internal my packing
which made me feel like a mischievous goon
the box, from my lusty hands,
was released from its shackling
& plummeted towards a dug-out hole in its cemetary
which in this case was just water,
5,000 miles from home -
5,000 miles of this damned ferry
and as the bitches leapt with joy
as my doom met my day,
there were so many lines
on my face that day
into the ocean
heading all ways from my past
I dove into the water
I dove so terribly fast
the box - I'll get another,
however fine a new corrugate may be
but my heart? Jesus Christ -
that belongs to me!
so despite the partial enemies
aboard your ship tonight,
don't be scared if you're wrong,
or if your parents are right
cause look at me, wet with ocean,
high on love & greed & fright -
I don't change much
from night to night
but I'm sure you got a boat
to keep you dry without a pail
just watch out for little birdies
who say they know how to sail
*although mildly reworked upon transcription, I remain too attached to the initial emotional charge upon this piece's conception to revise it further.
one horse in the stable lilting flowers unto me - 2011-10-11
nauseous, may I be
bridled in the hips' moment
'f'course, my mouth's closed
'f'course, my mouth's closed
stern from on board
body's parts, body's parts
'f'course, my mouth's closed
'f'course, my mouth's closed
one horse in the stable lilting flowers unto me
did you ever speak your mind?
it's one of these striking times,
these momentary out-of-lines
ditcha tell me, ditcha tell me, tripping on endings?
bridled in the hips' moment
'f'course, my mouth's closed
'f'course, my mouth's closed
stern from on board
body's parts, body's parts
'f'course, my mouth's closed
'f'course, my mouth's closed
one horse in the stable lilting flowers unto me
did you ever speak your mind?
it's one of these striking times,
these momentary out-of-lines
ditcha tell me, ditcha tell me, tripping on endings?
damned - 2011-9-27
if I weren't damned, props to me
learn how to freak out when it's time
if I weren't damned.
freak when it's clear - you irk it
are you a freak too, man?
I'm lost thinking we're the same
you irked it.
etched by mine own space in time -
spells that wisp a hue
damn the happenstance overlying
whom I never know
since I am damned.
learn how to freak out when it's time
if I weren't damned.
freak when it's clear - you irk it
are you a freak too, man?
I'm lost thinking we're the same
you irked it.
etched by mine own space in time -
spells that wisp a hue
damn the happenstance overlying
whom I never know
since I am damned.
laryngoscope, spring 2010
into your home I cascaded
the revelators segregated
to wash this down
I had a cup of hope
found in your body
with my laryngoscope
although I never drank
that many beers,
I've lowered my standards
over the years
the revelators segregated
to wash this down
I had a cup of hope
found in your body
with my laryngoscope
although I never drank
that many beers,
I've lowered my standards
over the years
spring love, early 2010
spring love
thought it was
someone in a sweater
it turned out
to be bad weather
spring love
rapid feather
ischemia
sullen clots
hysteria
spring love
thought it was
someone in a sweater
it turned out
to be bad weather
spring love
rapid feather
ischemia
sullen clots
hysteria
spring love
undeveloped punk song, 2011-9-16
soul unrest
soul en garde
look up to none
life is hard
alpha's stakes
are risks at hand
live to death
pain on land
ain't all good
left for fools:
fill they mouths
up with rules?
if you want to listen
we may be fair
but if you only hear
you'll only find me there
soul en garde
look up to none
life is hard
alpha's stakes
are risks at hand
live to death
pain on land
ain't all good
left for fools:
fill they mouths
up with rules?
if you want to listen
we may be fair
but if you only hear
you'll only find me there
confused about a crush, mid 2011
choose to join, make yourself special
while the ones who chose not are ahead of the crowd
hair so short there can be no telling
how to talk to the boy without being too loud
words we want went out to no one
translations from love out all over my head
a smirk-speaking boy makes ornament language
we toss all around & bring into bed
all up, out of feel, you travel around
the assembly of moments starts to generate sound
but you can't stop to hear it, or turn it around,
away, on, off, up, or otherwise down
it's the new thought a-brewin'
from the face in the crowd
who reminds us of dangers
of showing we're proud
cause you know you can do it,
whatever 'tis you do,
that leaves you with me
as I am in love with you
while the ones who chose not are ahead of the crowd
hair so short there can be no telling
how to talk to the boy without being too loud
words we want went out to no one
translations from love out all over my head
a smirk-speaking boy makes ornament language
we toss all around & bring into bed
all up, out of feel, you travel around
the assembly of moments starts to generate sound
but you can't stop to hear it, or turn it around,
away, on, off, up, or otherwise down
it's the new thought a-brewin'
from the face in the crowd
who reminds us of dangers
of showing we're proud
cause you know you can do it,
whatever 'tis you do,
that leaves you with me
as I am in love with you
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